Would you care for a creepy cookie, my sweet? (The best recipe for witches’ fingers  is here — trust me. I’ve tested for five years.  Roll them almost pencil thin between your fingers to create ridged spheres of dough that bake up just like this.)

A sweet potato pumpkin patch. (Mashed sweet potatoes + pretzel sticks +cilantro leaves = very smug appetizer.) Merci, Martha. Delish.

My mother and I had this conversation three days before the party:

Me: MOM! Martha made marshmallows into ghosts, using sprinkles for eyes and everything! They were so cute, but ugh. The work.

Mom: Why don’t you just go buy Peeps?

God Bless Peeps. (Pre-made brownie bites from Safeway + Barefoot Contessa recipe cream cheese frosting + Peep ghost attached with toothpick. So easy.)

Use a piping bag to turn mashed potatoes into ghosts, Martha-style. The eyes are black sesame seeds. (We so used instant mashed potatoes for this.)

Fancy a little Frankenstein for dessert? Use melted chocolate and a paintbrush to create scary faces inside plastic cups. Fill with vanilla pudding tinted green. Top with crushed chocolate-filled Oreos.

Scarlett the ladybug, Aunt Jaimee the witch, and the mother, my sister Kapri, who took all of the food pictures you’re enjoying this day.

My nieces Kaustin and Scarlett, both wearing wings:

The Haunted Hunger Hole: Feast if you Dare

If you look too closely at the Haunted Hunger Hole, you might discover things that will make you never want to eat again.

It’s beef jerky. My mother’s wave of disgusting brilliance. The worst part? By the end of the night, this tray was empty. Happy Halloween! (Behold, Mr. Rome, in Curious George glory.)